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Machete Kills (2013) – Review



The President of the United States recruits Machete to stop a high-tech arms dealer from abducting Mexicans and launching a missile aimed at Washington DC.


Danny Trejo – Machete
Mel Gibson – Voz
Amber Heard – Miss San Antonio
Michelle Rodriguez – Luz
Sofía Vergara – Desdemona
Carlos Estevez – Mr. President
Lady Gaga – La Camaleón
Antonio Banderas – El Camaleón 4
William Sadler – Sheriff Doakes
Cuba Gooding Jr. – El Camaleón 2
Jessica Alba – Sartana
Alexa Vega – Killjoy



This was awesome! I loved the first Machete, and this was just as good, if not better, than the original. Robert Rodriguez is obviously having tons of fun with the character, and he brought an incredibly long list of actors along to join the good times (Seriously, look at the cast list; it is insane).

True to form with sequels like this, everything was way more over the top…and that is saying something considering the original. More violence, more girls, more gadgets, and more machetes. While the plot is an homage to the 70s grindhouse films, there still were quite a few moments I was not expecting. I especially loved how it started off crazy, and by the end, it was just batshit insane. As outlandish as the first movie was, I did not expect the series to go in this direction.



As I said above, the cast is just nuts – so many recognizable faces popping in and out of the film.

Danny Trejo once again owned as Machete. His dialog was spot on, and he delivered everything with such contempt. Here is the ultimate badass who is pretty much annoyed with everything.

Amber Heard was incredibly sexy, as usual. She was great on the big screen, and I hope she gets her big break one of these days. Very lovely and very talented.

Michelle Rodriguez was excellent again as Luz. She had some great one-liners and kicked even more ass than she did in the original.

Mel Gibson – Regardless of how you feel about the man, you can’t deny his acting chops. He took a character that is so absurd, and he made it work. Not too many people could have pulled this role off so well.

Carlos Estevez (Charlie Sheen) reminded me that when he isn’t being a horse’s ass on TV, he really is a good actor. He was a far cry from his (allegedly) drug-fueled rants from a few years back. He played a sort of scumbag in this but, admittedly, a likable scumbag.


Robert Rodriguez just knows how to make this kind of movie. His love for the flair of the 70s films just oozes out of every frame. It warms my heart to see someone who can continue to make the movies he wants to make and not have to worry about what the studio thinks. No major studio would ever have put this sort of thing together.


Machete was originally one of the fake trailers for the feature length version of Grindhouse. The trailer went over so well that Rodriguez decided to make it into a full feature. Hobo with a Shotgun was another fake trailer that was made into a feature, and it is rumored that Eli Roth’s Thanksgiving will be next.



Loved it! The movie was the perfect sit-back-and-let-it-entertain-you film. If you enjoyed the first one, I can’t imagine you not liking the second. It has all the first one had and more.


While the original seemed to get good reviews from most critics, this one seems to be getting a lot of flak. I don’t get it. I thought it was just about the perfect follow up to the original. Also with that ending I want the sequel to this more than ANYTHING. The final installment of the trilogy could be the greatest thing ever. You have to see the trailer and even then you may still not believe it.


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