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Priest – Episode 96

What’s with all the bullets?

35 Responses to “Priest – Episode 96”

  • Stampy:

    Holy shit why haven’t i seen this movie!

    • Cecil:

      The studio really dropped the ball by releasing it at the wrong time and giving it crap marketing. (not to mention cutting it to PG-13)

  • Mike M:

    I actually kind of liked this movie, which is odd since im pretty much stuck in an 80s timewarp (damn you for ruining the story CGI)

    I also thought Benly did a good job….he kind of reminded me a little of Peter Weller, who would of been awesome in that role too im sure

    • Cecil:

      I think the movie has kind of an 80s vibe so that might help to explain.

      Oh yeah! He was channeling some Peter Weller, which may also explain why I liked it so much! (Weller is my favorite actor) He absolutely could have pulled this role off 15 years ago.

  • Bill Jones:

    This movie had a great feel and I wanted more when it was all over, but sadly we few are the only ones who seem to get it.

    • Cecil:

      I know, I’m bummed. I’m not giving up hope though. There have been other movies that came back from out of nowhere and actually got a sequel. The movie did make its money back so perhaps they will be willing to gamble again.

  • I haven’t seen this one yet but I have seen Legion which I do like!
    I think the reason this one done so poorly was because the theatrical cut was so butchered for that coveted PG-13 rating and piss-poor last minute post-production converted 3D! I never read the Mangas it was based on but i new it was a western story originally the post-apocalyptic thing was just something they did. Which I don’t mind as I said i haven’t read the books and I just like that style!
    Hey, i’m curious of your opinions on some current movie news like the GIJoe 2 being pushed back 9 months for post-conversion 3D!?
    Mirror, Mirror I heard stunk and Snow-White and the Huntsman looks awesome! XD

    • Cecil:

      I liked Legion and this was better than that.

      It kills me that they were willing to sack the movie to PG-13 and cram in 3D to jack up the ticket price. Post 3D needs to stop. (actually all 3D needs to stop IMHO) It brings nothing to the table except a higher ticket price.

      I’m trying to track down the books as we speak.

      GI Joe being pushed back is a terrible idea. Paramount panicked after Battleship stunk up the box office so they pushed GI Joe back to add 3D. No one wants it! This is even dumber because the actors have been touring to promote the movie and the first wave of toys was already headed to stores! So all this publicity is for nothing so they can add 3D. Horrible. One of the worst business moves in recent memory.

      Snow White and the Huntsman looks quite good, I just hope it doesn’t flounder under the mediocrity that is Kristen Stewart.

      • Cristiona:

        That whole thing with Battleship is just stupid, especially since Universal is still going to blame the Asylum for its failure. Sure guys. The mockbuster without a theatrical release is the reason your stupid movie based on a BOARD GAME is a miserable failure. Couldn’t possibly be because of the script, the concept, the writing…

        • Cecil:

          lol exactly. Right now they are playing the blame game instead of realizing that making a movie based on a board game that had no plot whatsoever for well over 200 million dollars was terrible idea. No, not any studio executive’s fault or anyone at Hasbro, its gotta be those guys that made a movie that sounds like our movie and released it on Syfy channel. Yup, thats gotta be it. Good grief, they probably spent more on lawyers than The Asylum spent on the budget of American Battleship.

          I have a friend of mine that took his daughter to see Battleship and he said the story is actually dumber then he expected. You would think they would have at least tried to make something of this but it seemed like the plot was the thing they focused on the least.

        • john:

          When I heard that the Battleship movie was actually based on the game I immediately thought of the tic-tac-toe film parody trailer in The Simpsons that looked like a way more interesting film concept.

      • Joshnorm:

        Only one movie was worth the 3D: Piranha 3D (James Cameron can go screw)

        Also it was to add more 3D to GI Joe which they passed on initially but also rumored to delay to add more Channing Tatum according to articles like:

        Beware spoilers in article…

        • Cecil:

          I very much enjoyed Aja’s Piranha. It was fun, funny, and filled to the brim with gorgeous ladies. I’m a big fan of Kelly Brook so having her in the movie made it just delightful.

          As far as Tatum being edited into GI Joe 2…ugh. I was so happy they killed off his stupid character for the sequel and now they are shoehorning him back in? Yeah, thats not going to make the movie into ass. Lets just add in a guy who was killed 5 minutes into the production. That shouldn’t turn the entire production into a complete cluster. Who are these people with the money to make these idiotic decisions?! Everyone I spoke to was happy Tatum wasn’t in the sequel because he was by far the worst thing in the original.

    • john:

      The best 3D I have seen is in My Bloody Valentine 3D that was actually pretty good and only really works in horror films. In action movies it is completely pointless due to fast editing shoots and amount of content on screen that I get bad enough eye strain/headache watching 3D in normal films but perhaps that is just me.

      • Cecil:

        I don’t mind as much when movies are made with 3D in mind from the start. They tend to be more creative as for when they throw the 3D in. I just am beyond annoyed with the laziness of doing 3D in post. They always look terrible and it beings nothing to the movie, aside from a more expensive ticket.

        As a whole though, I would be happy if 3D would just go away altogether. Give me a good movie, not a mediocre movie where every 5 minutes something is poking me in the eye. Take the money you would have put in 3D and get better writers.

  • I don’t have any kind of desire to see this movie (I watch science fiction, but this movie doesn’t appear to be anything up my alley), but I enjoyed this review, even if it was for a film that is a little dark, and didn’t have the copious amounts of humor I am used to with your reviews. However, it was thoroughly entertaining, and I still laughed where it was appropriate. Great job, Cecil! Can’t wait to see what next week brings (and that Rad is in the future!).

    • Cecil:

      If you dig sci-fi then you should give this one a go. It oozes atmosphere and Priest is just an awesome character. I had a hard time finding things to goof on because the movie is so kickass.

      RAD is coming…sometime. Probably later in the year. Love that flick.

      Thanks! 🙂

  • albert:

    I saw this movie a while back, I’m gonna give it another watch. Keep up the reviews they are great!!

  • Cristiona:

    You can blame Twilight for wimpifying vampires, but I still view it as a continuation of the work Anne Rice did with hers. Her vampires were still killers, but she’s the one who started down the Oh Poor Me route of sympathetic vampires. It was continued with Buffy (specifically, Angel) and the Meyers went off the cliff.

    Karl Urban was great in this and he’s rapidly becoming one of my favorite character actors.

    The movie was fun, but it was silly as hell, and that scene where he jumps from thrown block to thrown block was a little too goofy for my taste. The movie wasn’t wuxia enough to justify that scene.

    Also, as a complete aside, Dark City was fucking awesome. Especially the director’s cut which eliminated the spoileriffic opening narration. Actually, the Monsignor’s outfit kind of reminds me of Mr. Book.

    • Cecil:

      I went after Twilight for being the easy target and because I just dislike how it is glorified mediocrity. Oh well, at least it gave us Ashley Greene. Anne Rice did do a bit more to vampire lore, with the whole society and such, but Twilight just made them a bunch of dullards. Angel was tortured soul but he was interesting and he at the very least killed other vampires. (along with humans, monsters, gods, etc)

      Urban has yet to disappoint me. He just shows up and chews the scenery on command.

      The movie did dip into the silly, which is why I goofed on the jumping on blocks scene. However, it never took me out of the movie. There never seemed a point where it was too much. The Priests were just kung fu jedi wizard ninjas, and I was totally cool with that.

      Dark City is the shit. Another movie the studio totally fumbled, that flick should be known and referenced way more than it is.

      • Michael:

        I’m probably about to be destroyed by the Nerd-dom, but I think that (unintentionally of course) Stephanie Meyer has created a vampire that is remarkably similar to the original Victorian (and the Lugosian) envisioning of the Vampire as symbol for aristocratic sexual predation on their subservients.

        I can totally envision a version of Edward that has used the same basic plan throughout the decades to now create a totally willing blood slave in Bela with absolutely no need for supernatural mind-affection. He plays on her fear of death and her vanity by teasing her with immortality, and by placing her in his world of high-powered politics and violence, he gives her a sub-conscious need to increase her own personal power for simple self-preservation. All the while he is quite possibly lying about how “she is beyond his powers reach” and is directing her every thought until she is utterly dependent on him in every sector of her life and is well beyond the grasp of anyone else who might be able to protect her. After she has become his slave, he can then “change her” into a near will-less Dragon with the disease that has consumed his existence

        But I’ve probably read way too many Vampire: The Masquerade books 🙂

  • Chris:

    Do you think “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter” will be any good? I have read the book, and from the trailers I have noticed moments that never happened in the story, but it still looks entertaining even though I hate all of the CG. I am a practical guy, but if it is not possible to use sets, make-up, animatronics, etc, then than is fine.

    • Cecil:

      I’m pretty excited about it. I think it has major potential to be a ridiculous fun flick. I’m also hoping it does well enough to prompt Pride and Prejudice and Zombies back on track.

      I prefer practical effects too but it seems most places are intent on shoving CGI down our throats whether we want it or not. I understand the use of CGI on movies from The Asylum (cheaper and faster to do, especially when done as bad as they do) but for some bigger budgeted movies they have the time and can afford to do the effects practical. In the old days creativity was used and they made things work. Now, its just green screen + CGI.

  • Michael:

    Dear God, Pleas tell me that the Tooth Fairy 2 (complete with the living cat puke that is Larry the Something-or-Other) is a troll poster.

  • Mario:

    Its A-Me, Mario 😀

  • Dan:

    Great flick and great review. You forgot the uncle Owen reference from star wars!

  • Ryan:

    Awesome review, loved the blue ray version of this movie

  • Clinton:

    I highly recommend the comic this movie was very loosely based on.

    I had trouble enjoying this movie because I feel they squandered a great license. They could have made a Western that had zombies and fallen angels with a main character that was priest half possessed by a demon.

  • Jr.:

    Karl Urban is great. I pray to God they make a sequel to this AND Dredd.

  • mogens:

    hey the pirates movies are great you are just jalous

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